Over the course of the last 10 years or so, between my work, motherhood and even more work, staying fit became less of a priority. Big mistake. The 15 pounds I had put on crept up on me like the devil. I wasn’t about to lose my neck all over again, so I searched for some classes that offered similar programs that I was familiar with, but I can’t seem to say the words “Step Aerobics” without being judged about my age and motor skills by modern day fitness coaches. I was actually surprised (and sad) to learn that it was passé and so was I.
Fitness programs nowadays require far more coordination than the former Step Aero. Having two left feet, I knew I was in big trouble. I tried kickboxing or Tae Bo, which incorporated martial arts moves into the routine, and other forms of slimnastics from something called Body Combat to Body Attack, to Zumba, but my feet had a mind of their own. I struggled to get the combinations right and move with the rest of the class but I doubted if I was doing any of it right. I didn’t feel any fitter than when I started and the scale still didn’t budge despite feeling tired and spent after each workout. I also tried Pilates classes but I wound up falling asleep on the mat in the middle of the sessions. I would wake up to the sound of my own snoring. The embarrassment made me wish with all my heart that the earth would open up swallow me whole.
For a lack of a fancier workout regimen, I tried outdoor brisk walking which eventually led to running. The movements were humanly basic, natural and just straight as an arrow. I knew I could manage this one flawlessly. Anyone can run even with two left feet. Just one foot in front of the other. It would be virtually impossible to fall asleep in between strides. I guess that would make me a special kind of stupid if I still didn’t get it right.